First Marathon Nightmare

I just woke up abruptly, to the sound of my alarm on my phone... Its 4:30 am. This is the time I normally wake up to get ready for my runs, as i'm a morning runner. I go to use the bathroom (sorry) and I look in the mirror. I was dreaming!!

I posted on twitter that I just woke up from a marathon nightmare and began writing this post about it.
I was running in the Rock 'n' Roll USA marathon in Washington,DC, my hometown marathon (which is a race that's on my bucket list). I'm at the start line with all the other runners and for some reasons the race director and coordinators have given out brown bag lunches, with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in them. (Now, I don't know whether this had anything to do with the fact that i've had PB&J for lunch most of this week or what...)

But, everyone has a brown bag lunch. This is odd, because normally post race food is given, well, after the race. But, this is a dream or nightmare, so anything goes I guess... Whatever.

The gun fires and everyone starts the race. But, in my hand, I've got 3 brown bag lunches!! I don't know how I got them or if the other racers just "left me holding the bag", but I've got them.

I begin to run, but I've gotta put these bags down, so I decide to put them under an overpass and figure I will come back for them after the race. (Please don't ask me why, this is a dream/nightmare)

Now, this particular overpass looks like one of the overpasses at Hains Point, under I-395. But, in real life, I don't even know if the race course goes anywhere near that particular overpass at Hains Point.

Anyway, I'm already in the back of the pack. We're talking dead last. I'm so far in the back, I'm having conversations with the driver of the van that picks you up if you don't look like you're gonna finish. That's how far to the back of the pack I am.

I decide to start running... A light bulb comes on and says, "you can't leave those brown bags there". So I go back to pick up the brown bags and put them on a table. (I don't know where the table came from, this is a dream/nightmare... Stuff just happens and appears, you know?)

After putting the brown bags with the PB&J sandwiches in them on the table, I can begin my run. There's a man that directs me which way to go.  By this time, an hour or so has gone by and I'm the only one running.  Doubt begins to creep into my head and the negative thoughts about not finishing are getting louder and louder. I begin to think about the 26.2 miles that I still have to run and how long it will take, with no one else around to keep me company... My discouraged trot becomes a walk and I quit.

(ALL OVER SOME PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICHES IN SOME BROWN PAPER BAGS?!?! - you might ask)

I'll chuckle and say, no. I doubt that's the real reason. There maybe something deeper that I need to figure out about myself, on my journey back to health through running.

And that's what so great about running and becoming an endurance athlete. It allows me to dig deeper into who I am as a person and what I'm all about. The competition is not against other runners... The competition is within me. My mind versus my own body.

I was talking to my dad the other day and he complimented me on my weight loss so far. He asked me about my running and I told him that I was preparing for a few upcoming races. I told him about how I enjoy the experience and my strategy of running races and he jumped in said "... And then you speed up at the end to try to win, right?" I laughed and explained that running and racing is not about winning "the race you're running in", its about winning the race YOU are in. Whether, you're running for weight loss, running to get fit, running for you're mind's sake or running to find out who you are... Running is about winning the race YOU are in.

I hope you enjoyed this...  It's about 6am and it's time to begin my day.  My wife stepped out of the house, so I'm here while the kids are still sleep.  No run this morning.  But, I'll get mine in and I hope you get yours in too.

Feel free to leave a comment in the comment box and provide your thoughts on why you run? I look forward to reading them and hopefully we can encourage one another in winning the race WE are in.